"Good job." It's worth saying

There are a few things that never fail to boost my spirits. One of them is October light shining through fall foliage. Another is when someone tells me I’ve done something well.
           
Why should they matter, those overt acknowledgements of admiration or appreciation? Maybe because none of us really knows how we are received by others. We try our best, most of the time. We hope we’re doing okay, but many of us are plagued with uncertainty. Self-doubt, given time to propagate, can be overpowering.
 
I’ve been a hospice volunteer for two and half years. One of my clients had dementia, so it was hard to know how much affect my visits had. I sang and chatted and read poems. I was a one-woman improv show, and it could be discouraging. I couldn’t help wondering, do my efforts make any difference?
 
After my fourth visit, the client’s spouse said to me,
 
“I don’t know if anyone’s said anything to you, but you’re great at this. [Client] really perks up when you’re here.”
 
I was transformed by the simple comment. To know our endeavors matter…helps a lot. It reminded me that I need to share my admiration for the spouse’s never-ending daily efforts in return. Every time. It will never hurt.

And maybe I need to share my appreciation for my own spouse, and my friends, and the cashier at the grocery store, and the gas station attendant who always offers a nice smile and friendly greeting. Maybe we should look for opportunities to spread the wealth of those little boosts every chance we get.
 
What a nice meal you made. This place looks great. Wow, you’ve been working hard. You were so kind today. You are so talented. I can tell you put time into that. Thanks – you've made such a difference. 
 
You are not alone. I see you.
 
It’s worth saying out loud.